Know how to protest?

One of the boards I post at got into the normal 4th of July heated debate over flag burning ('cause seriously, what board DOESN'T have some yutz coming out strongly for or against it on Independence Day so everyone gets all pissed off???) Somebody posted this, as if to end the whole debate:

"We all need to remember that our liberties are only ours until they infringe or offend others!!!!"

So, I replied with this:

Actually, that's NOT true. Being offended by something is not enough to make it legally stop BECAUSE of freedom of speech. That's why the KKK is allowed to recruit for members on the sidewalks of of several different states to this DAY and I can't do a damn thing about it. It's also why other people are allowed to protest AGAINST the KKK sitting on the sidewalk until they get embarrassed enough to leave.

However, the moment the KKK decides to burn a cross on my lawn or somewhere else where I can see it, it's a threat of violence (based on what it's always meant in the past) and THAT'S why it's against the law, just like what Booknut said about murder not being under freedom of expression. That's why hate crimes were put into law, not because they would offend other races & creeds, but because there is ALWAYS the threat of real violence involved. Burning a flag is offensive to some, but it has always been a symbol of nonviolent protest.

I think the problem in America is that we always want someone else to handle our business rather than confront it ourselves. Somewhere in the 80's, we stopped going out and protesting ourselves and starting demanding that the government step in for us. If you don't like flag burning, why not just go up to that flag burner with a whole bunch of your friends and peacefully protest against it? Or, heck, TALK to this flag burner and see what he's thinking! What if this flag burner was someone who'd fought for this country and been forgotten? What if this flag burner had lost family in the civil rights movement and still sees discrimination in his America? What if this flag burner is a Native American whose heritage and dignity have been entirely stripped by the "American dream"?

America simply doesn't offer the same comforts to everyone and it CAN'T, not by laws, anyway. Too many people have different attitudes and opinions to force them to think your way just by taking a vote and passing a bill. You CAN, however, move LOTS of people with numbers in non violent protest. It takes more time and effort, but anything worth doing is worth doing well. Our whole COUNTRY is founded on the belief that you can protest...remember, most of us came here out of protest or fleeing from OTHER countries that REALLY wouldn't let you have your say.

So, stop waiting for your government to help you...get out there and give those you disagree with a reason to believe in what you say...go make eye contact and talk about what ails you and listen to what ails them, if you're REALLY this upset. Posting to websites in an overzealous way only aggravates tensions and makes no real difference in anyone's approach...just strengthens their resolve to keep their own opinion safe.

In which case, it's probably pretty stupid for me to have posted this anyway! :-)



Then they came back with this part:

Most Vietnam vets I know are dead-set against desecration of the flag. Their country sent them there to protect the freedoms we take so casually. What they were angry about was those folks who didn't give them the respect that they deserved for DOING what their country asked.


So, I replied again with this:

Conversely, most of the vets I know were angry that their country sent them there in the first place because they didn't feel they were protecting us or our rights at all and they lost close friends and family over it. On top of that, there was still less respect given to vets of color at the time and more likelihood they would be sent to the front line, so there's a whole other level of problems inherent with that. Oh, and let's not forget the wars in which Asian Americans have helped out, only to have their families thrown into internment camps. No one can be right or wrong about their personal experiences with this country and what it's meant to them.

It really still reinforces the point I was making...we only meet a limited amount of people in our lives, so we don't always get the full picture of what America is. We've had just as much to pat ourselves on the back for as we've had to kick ourselves in the butt for in this country, so not everyone who lives here has had the same positive feelings about this place. Still, it's all part of America and what that flag stands for, even (and especially) the crappy parts. Just because we know a bunch of people with a certain opinion, we can't claim right or wrong on what America means and what the flag stands for for others. With the good comes the bad.

So, you COULD look at a flag burning as being the burning of what's negative, not what's positive about this country...then you'd have to find out why that person burned the flag and what made life in this country bad for him/her and address THAT need instead of the surface offense of flag burning. Imagine what good we could do in this country if people did that more often...found out WHY a person did something and helped them through that pain or injustice before condemning them for the act alone. Now THAT would be an America to always be proud of!

Haven't heard a thing since! :-)

Vanity, thy name is EXTENSIONS (or some other hair thing!)

Okay, I don't see how it's possible for ANY woman to not become entirely focused on a mirror when they do dramatic changes to their hair.

As a rule, I usually avoid doing things like makeup, pushup bras and coloring my hair because I like to look the way God intended me to look (we'll see how well such free spirited hippy thoughts last me into my 60's and 70's when the line between boobs and knees blurs heavily, but for NOW...!). I get my hair relaxed because I can't do anything with it when it'a all thick in its nature Native American/afro style, but that's really about as far as I go.

Until last week.

Last week I went to my hairdresser (whom I adore so much, I created a stamp for her) and she had a ponytail. Now, most black women really can't get their hair that long, but I'm dumb enough to believe anything (being a hardcore tomboy), so I'm like "Oh, cool! I so want my hair to get that long so I can do the "Marsha, Marsha, MARSHA" thing Jan does in the Brady Bunch."

She laughed at me and went into her psuedo-commercial voice: "Well, now you, too can have the hair of your dreams...just BUY it!" Then she pulls the hair out...and it's added hair! I'm not up enough on all this glamor talk to say if this qualified as extensions, a weave, whatever, but it was very natural looking and really cute...which meant immediately that I couldn't do it because I can't KEEP things looking cute for more than a day after I leave the shop.

She was really onto the idea of my having one, though, 'cause she told me how easy it was to care for and how once I bought the hair, it was mine, so I could do anything I wanted with it. Once it started sounding like a fun dress-up thing instead of dumb girly-girl work, I started warming to the idea (and before I could change my mind, her assistant rushed out to buy some hair).

So now I have this ponytail that makes me look more like the Native American side of me than the African American...and it really does make me look skinnier than before. I like the way it looks, but now I SWEAR I can't pass a mirror without playing with it! As it stands, I tried on every outfit I liked (lingerie included!) to see the effect with longer hair. I'm thoroughly ashamed, totally self abosrbed and I DON'T care. Like Narcisuss, I could DIE in front of the mirror, so long as the hair sweeps gently over my shoulder in a sort of sexy "come hither while I DIE" sort of way! Kevin isn't helping 'cause he actually likes the way it looks, so he'll let me come in with some new outfit or hair position for the ponytail and "ooo" and "ahh" appropriately.

See, THIS is how it starts! First, it's just a little extra HAIR, then it's a press on nail or two and the next thing you know, I'll be selling my body for extensions and collecting barber shop clippings to make new bangs to replace the ones I'll fry off with the gold highlights I'll have tried to add in myself...AUUUUGGGGHHHH!!!

I can't stay...I gotta go (sigh) brush it out again...!